Hope To Die
by Adurna Skulblaka
Summary: Sequel to Cross My Heart. Light believes L to be dead, but the detective has other plans. Weakened by the loss of L, Light turns to the only thing he still believes in - Kira. While he descends into madness once more, L contacts his heirs and brings them into the battle. However, L doesn't intend to end this the way he originally planned to.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: Ta-da! Here it is! Chapter 1 of the sequel to _Cross My Heart._**

**Just to clear up any confusion for you, the first part of this chapter will be in L's POV.**

**And now I won't keep you any longer. Onward!**

* * *

_I pad along the corridors of Headquarters. The tiles of the floor are cold on my bare feet - almost unbearably so, in fact - but it helps me to centre myself, to stay calm and collected, which is exactly what I need._

_ The Task Force is lingering in the main room, and Light-kun is downstairs with Misa-san, saying his goodbyes. While I have no doubt that she must be a nice woman, I can't stand having her around; not only is she… less intelligent than the people I prefer to speak to, but she's competition. Who knew I, Lawliet, could be jealous? I, for one, certainly never thought I'd need to hide such a trivial emotion._

_ I am soon joined by Wedy and Aiber; they have stayed here after the chaos with Higuchi, but they have taken a backseat when it comes to the investigation. For now, I am simply supplying them with somewhere they can relax, but it seems that I have another task that I must ask of them now._

_ Together, we make our way to Watari's office. I knock once before entering, Aiber and Wedy flanking me. _

_ The room is dark, save for the glow of the various screens that show footage of the rooms in Headquarters. Of course, Watari is watching them all, but he turns when he hears my footsteps._

_ "Ryuzaki?" He sounds surprised. I don't often make visits to him in person; like with everyone else in the world, I usually communicate from behind a computer screen, and Watari is no exception when I am on a case. I am silent, so he prompts me with, "Is something the matter?"_

_ I take my time replying, but he knows me well enough to know that I will respond in time. I lift my head, messy black hair falling back from my face – I have considered cutting it before, but I never found any real motivation for it. I prefer it long._

_ "Yes," I mumble, scuffing the floor with my toes. "Father, I believe that Light-kun is Kira."_

_ There are two things that I mentioned that only Watari knows the importance of._

_ First: I called him 'Father'. He has always been a parent to me for as long as I can remember. That first day I met him, in a snowy winter in England, has remained imprinted on my brain for many years. He gave me a home and taught me, and it is only because of him that I am L now. He is the only parent I remember._

_ Second: Light-kun and my suspicions of him. Watari is the only person to know of my relationship with Light-kun, and that is because I did not wish to hide it from him, but also because it would have been impossible to anyway. Nobody else is aware of it, to my knowledge. Not even Aiber and Wedy, and I am now asking for their assistance in a matter concerning it that is incredibly important._

_ I intend to clear Light-kun's name. It will be a long, painful process that may span many years, but I will do it. I do not believe that Light-kun is Kira – in the sense that he truly is_ _this 'God'. No, Kira is another entity altogether, one that is merely inside him, one that the notebook brought to him. I wish I could solve everything by simply destroying the notebook, but there is another one out there somewhere, and it is my duty to find it._

_To do it, I will have to put Light-kun through hell._

_ Watari turns in his chair, his bushy eyebrows drawn into a frown. He doesn't question me; Watari is intelligent, too, and so he knows how my thoughts work. __He knows as well as I do that I must be right, too. I have no doubt that Watari is more ready to accept the fact that Light-kun is Kira, while I have struggled to put them together ever since Light-kun and I confessed our feelings for each other._

_ "What do you intend to do, Ryuzaki?"_

_ "Light-kun… he must be offered what Kira wants." I close my eyes to hide the pain that I don't want anyone else to see. I am L – emotionless, cold, justice. I open them again, and I am certain that my feelings are hidden. "He must become L and for that to happen, I must die."_

_ I didn't expect anyone to cry out - and I'm right, obviously - but my friends do react. Wedy gasps, Aiber raises his eyebrows, and Watari's frown deepens._

_ "I must fake my death," I explain, tucking my hands into my pockets. "The most natural way for that to happen is for me to have a heart attack. Light-kun would not expect it to happen, especially if he is Kira. I have no doubt that he would look into the matter, but he will not find anything. It shouldn't be too difficult. He will be too distressed at the time to be very thorough, I imagine. We must convince him that I am truly dead."_

_ I can feel the eyes of Wedy and Aiber on my back, but I ignore them for now. I return Watari's concerned gaze easily. As always, he remains a steady pillar that I can lean on._

_ "Are you sure?" he asks._

_ I nod my head once. "Positive."_

* * *

_I have always been a very good actor. It is necessary when in the position of the greatest three detectives in the world. I have had to change my style of work to fit each of my three names, so nobody would suspect me. L, Coil and Deneuve all have their type, just like every person has different handwriting. _

_ But that doesn't change anything. It hurts to see Light in so much pain._

_ I long to sit up, to comfort him, to tell him that I'm not dying, but I can't. This is necessary for him. In order to clear his name – albeit in a very roundabout fashion – I need him to become L. I will have to capture him eventually, and then I will help him to become Light Yagami again, instead of allowing him to descend into the madness of Kira._

_ And, just on time, Aiber and Wedy arrive. Just as we planned._

_ Wedy consoles Light to the best of her ability – thank goodness, I don't know how much longer I'm able to ignore him – and Aiber carries me out. I remain limp throughout all of this. It's a miracle that Light didn't think to check my pulse, but it is down to my friends that I escaped so quickly. Could Light's horror mean that he cares more for me than he lets on?_

_ I hope so. Because the only reason I am doing this is because I care for him very deeply. I wouldn't do it for anyone else, not even Watari._

_ I try to tune out Light's howl behind me, but it is impossible._

* * *

_A few hours later, once Aiber has managed to get me out of Headquarters, I am told the news._

_ Watari is dead._

_ This was not supposed to happen. This was not part of the plan. I don't know why it happened and, quite frankly, I am no longer in any state to try to understand it. Father is dead and Light-kun believes that I_ _am dead, too._

_ Now I understand loss. _

_ My preparations are already in place, thank goodness, so all I have to do is reach the plane – my plane; thanks to Watari, nobody else is onboard. I don't allow myself to think about how long it will be until I can free Light from his burden, because that hurts too much, simply adding to the weight in my chest._

_ No, I need to think ahead. I need to plan. I need to prepare. And, if necessary, I need to switch off my emotions._

_ It won't be smooth, but it will work._

* * *

L was never aware of how Watari truly died. What actually happened was this:

The Shinigami, Rem, decided to take matters into her own hands. L had given the order to Watari to prepare the notebook for removal from Japan; he was to send it to another country, one where they would be allowed to test it in an execution. Then they were to wait thirteen days - if the criminal that used the notebook didn't die, then that made the Thirteen Day Rule fake, and made Light and Misa suspects once more.

Rem found out about this, and simply could not allow it to continue.

She wasted no time in killing Watari once she discovered L's plans. However, there was something she did not take into account.

When a Shinigami kills to protect a human they care about - in this case, Misa - the Shinigami will die, too. Watari was the one carrying out the preparations. When Rem wrote his name in her notebook, she had only minutes. She didn't have time to write L's name before she began to crumble.

But nobody would ever know this, because all the Task Force found after they had pulled themselves together was a pile of dust.

* * *

Seeing Wammy's House for the first time in many years was a surprise to L. It had been a long time since he'd last set foot – or ragged, falling-apart-trainer clad foot – on those grounds, and it would have been oddly refreshing to lay his eyes on them again if it wasn't under the current circumstances.

The children were out and about, playing and entertaining themselves. They ran back and forth across the gravel in a game of tag, or they busied themselves out on the grass with their favourite activities, whether that was reading or writing or video games… whatever struck their fancy. Wammy's House was incredibly flexible when it came to the happiness of the orphans.

L skirted his way around the courtyard; the few children that came to greet him were polite and kind, and he couldn't help returning their smiles, even if he didn't quite feel like it. Of course, they had no idea who he was, but they were always eager to make newcomers welcome, whoever they might be. L recognised a few of them from various reports he'd received from Roger, the headmaster of Wammy's House, but those children weren't why L was there.

It was a relief to step into the cool safety of the great mansion. L never felt very at home outdoors anymore – not that he had to begin with.

The main room was quite large, even for a building of such size. On the right towards the back was a wide staircase that led upstairs to the rooms, and along the balcony that looked down into the hall would be a corridor that would end up at Roger's office. To the left was the door to the hall where the children ate, and there was also a corkboard that displayed the most recent rankings. L remembered that across the grounds was the building where the children attended their classes.

It was almost too easy to recall stepping into Wammy's House for the first time, clutching Watari's hand and staring around in wonder. With a pang, L locked the memory away. He couldn't afford to linger on memories, not yet; once he'd handed over control of his part of the investigation, he would have more than enough time to study them in detail.

Silently, he made his way up the stairs. There were a few other orphans lingering in the corridors, but most were outside, enjoying the sunny day. L's trainers squeaked on the polished floor, so he toed them off and left them by the top of the stairs; they annoyed him, and he preferred to be barefoot when he was indoors anyway.

It wasn't long until L was stood outside Roger's office, feeling oddly like he was in trouble with the headmaster. He supposed that he was, partly; he felt that Watari's death was his fault, even if he didn't know just what part of the plan had failed, and he knew that Roger had looked up to the man. With a quiet sigh, L raised his fist and knocked.

Roger knew to expect him. That had been part of the arrangements Watari had made, so when L heard the old man say "Come in", he entered without hesitation.

The headmaster was seated behind his desk, and in front of it were the two that L had arranged to see.

Crouched on the floor, clicking pieces of his puzzle into place, was Near. His hair was shockingly white, and matched his baggy shirt perfectly. He didn't even glance up, but simply continued twisting his hair around his fingers and sorting out his puzzle. He was the youngest in the room, but he was by far the most distant; cold, calculating, unfeeling. It was rare that anyone would see Near engaging in conversation with anyone at Wammy's House, and if he did, it was very unlikely that it would be friendly.

Mello, on the other hand, was the opposite. Where Near was almost robot-like, Mello was forever on edge. He was known to be angry and even violent towards the other children, but his sharp intelligence made up for his fierce nature. He favoured dark clothes where Near preferred light. He turned to look at L when he entered, and his icy blue eyes sparked with interest. He didn't bother to sweep a stray portion of his blonde hair out of the way; L suspected that Mello allowed it to do what it wished to enhance his wildness. Mello was three years Near's senior, only a few months away from being fifteen.

But L turned his attention to Roger, who was watching him from behind his glasses.

"What name will you be going by?" the older man asked.

It was almost painful how much he reminded L of Watari. Going by the stiff set of his shoulders, Roger knew it, too.

"Ryuzaki," L replied quietly.

Roger nodded. Mello narrowed his eyes and turned on his heel to face the headmaster, his confusion evident. "Who's this, Roger?" he demanded, narrowing his eyes. "Not some other idiot you've brought in to see if there's something wrong with me, is it? _Is it_?" Mello's voice rose an octave in his anger, but Roger waved a hand to dismiss it.

"No, of course not," he said in what was supposed to be a soothing tone, but just ended up being his usual drone.

"Then who is he?" Crossing his arms, Mello swung around to face L, puffing out his chest to make himself appear bigger. L felt an amused smile flicker across his features; Mello was like a young cat, fluffing up its fur and hissing to seem more threatening. Evidently, L's reaction was the wrong one, because Mello took a step towards him and snarled, "What the hell are you _smirking _about?"

"Mello," Roger warned.

L held up a hand to stop the headmaster. He looked down at Mello, searching his expression.

Combined, Near and Mello made L, that was obvious. Near was L's brain, his thoughts, his clever mind; and Mello was his newly discovered emotions, the part of him that allowed him to set himself boundaries when it came to dealing out justice. Even L had to be careful when it came to that.

L considered the wisdom of his decision, but then went on anyway. "It wouldn't do to threaten me, _Mihael Keehl_."

Mello's face went white. He didn't move back, but narrowed his eyes, clearly fighting to keep the sudden fear from his features.

Knowing the true name of one of the orphans was impossible for any ordinary person, and it was a sign of ultimate trust if one of the children decided to divulge that information. 'Mello' and 'Near' were aliases, just like 'L' was. The fact that L knew Mello's name meant that he could only be one person.

Surprisingly, it wasn't Mello that spoke first, but he continued to open and close his mouth like a fish. Near put the last piece of his puzzle into place, then lifted his head. He turned his face to the side, regarding L out of the corner of one eye.

There was a tiny, slight smile on his lips.

"What brings you here, L?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note: Ok, I'll admit, I enjoyed that little plot twist of 'L's death'. *Evil cackle* Now, for this chapter, I watched a couple of episodes of the anime to get Mello's character in my head again. Not that that was a bad thing, or anything... the anime is just fantastic.**

**Anyway... this is only the second chapter and I'm thrilled with the response! Thank you all for your lovely reviews, as always.**

* * *

"_L?_" Mello's voice was a brave attempt at disbelief, but there was a waver in it that he couldn't quite hide. There was also an eagerness that he was unable to disguise; his icy eyes glittered with something like hunger as he took in L's hunched form, scanning him over. Mello straightened his shoulders and inclined his head. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to insult you."

There was a soft, amused 'hm' from by their feet. Near had turned back to his puzzle, but the smile on his lips still lingered, no doubt encouraged by Mello's apology. He didn't comment though, but simply clicked another puzzle piece into place. L nodded and said a soft, "It's fine."

Appearing to forget the presence of Roger, Mello turned to face L fully. He leaned forward on the balls of his feet, fixing his gaze on L's face. He wasted no time in asking the question that was on his mind. He repeated Near's question, but he was more demanding, more forceful than his rival. "Why are you here?"

L glanced away, staring out of the window. He spoke to a tree that was swaying in the breeze outside instead of his heirs. "Something… unexpected has occurred in the Kira Case. I am no longer able to lead the investigation." He paused, waiting for questions, but both of the boys held their tongues so he continued. "I am here to hand over the title of L."

"So you've picked one of us?"

"Mello," Roger sighed. "Please, let the man speak. For once in your life, know when to stay silent." Mello shot a glare at the old man, but did as he was told. Biting the inside of his lip, he turned to L again and tried to be patient.

A tiny smile played on the corners of L's lips. His grey eyes flicked back over to Mello's and, to the boy's disbelief, he shook his head. "Not quite."

"What do you mean 'not quite'?" Mello narrowed his eyes, and his hands curled into fists at his sides. He didn't lash out, though; he would never dream of harming L, his idol. It was only because he hadn't realised who he was that he'd been rude in the first place.

When L didn't reply, Near spoke up, raising his head again. "Isn't it obvious, Mello? Surely you know what L wants us to do."

_Us._ Wants _us_ to do_._ Mello's lips pulled up into a silent snarl at Near's words. "You have to be joking," he spat. "You want me to work with _him_?"

"Exactly," L confirmed. "I have every faith that you will be able to arrest Kira if you work as a team."

"Impossible," Mello dismissed, flicking his hand. "I won't do it. Sorry, Ryuzaki. Not happening." At their feet, Near rolled his eyes and sighed.

Grimacing, L straightened his shoulders a bit, and Mello felt a slight curl of worry in his stomach. While he didn't look like much, he had no doubt that L could appear intimidating if he wished. "Isn't there any way that you could do this, Mello?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "Innocent people will die while Kira is at large. I'm certain that you can put aside your differences for this."

Mello just hissed under his breath and pointedly turned on his heel, facing the wall.

With a satisfied sound, Near pushed the complete puzzle away from himself and hugged his knees. One hand drifted up into his hair to twist it around his finger. "If you are willing, I can think of a way that would enable us to fulfil both of your wishes."

L nodded, and if anyone had been paying attention, they would have seen faint relief in his expression. Roger would have noticed it, if he hadn't been carefully watching Mello. He was wary of the boy, worried that he would say something to L he would regret later – like refuse this offer. "Go on, Near."

"Considering that you are passing over the title of L, that means you wish to have little to no part in the Kira Case from now on. You would like us both to work together, which Mello will not allow. However, what if you were to simply direct us both, and we work separately?" Near tilted his head back to look up at L. His eyes were so similar to L's, and yet so different; where Near's were blank, almost robotic, there was a clear mask in place in L's. "That way you could make certain that our actions do not conflict. We'll be able to work much more efficiently."

Near did have something else he wanted to say, but he fell silent. _Also, L, you have been very interested in this case up until now. What has changed your mind?_ But he felt that that would be overstepping the line, so he kept it to himself.

Instead, he moved his gaze over to Mello. "So… what do you say?"

There was a long pause in which nobody spoke. Mello could feel the eyes of everyone in the room on him, and it made his skin prickle unpleasantly. Eventually, he exhaled a short breath and muttered, "Fine. But I have a condition-"

"And I have a few of my own," L interrupted.

"Oh?" Near tilted his head to the side. _Interesting. _"What would those be?"

L shifted his eyes back to the windowpane. "The most important of them is this: when you arrest Kira, you will not kill him. He will be captured and left to me. I would like to deal with this issue personally.

"Second," he continued, "you will both need a team around you. To protect, assist, serve… whatever you wish. But I insist on this. I will not have either of you left alone." L had to admit to himself, he sounded more like a father than a detective in that moment, but he couldn't help himself. At the moment, Mello and Near were the only two people he trusted, and he wasn't going to risk losing them. "Finally, I will not ask you to tell me everything you plan to do, but I will ask that you notify me of any significant actions."

"That sounds agreeable," Near said, and then added, "Mello?"

"That's fine with me."

The last of the tension drained from L's shoulders. "If there is anything you want to request, now would be the time."

Mello leaped in, his head snapping around so he could see L again. "I want to pick one of the members of my team. There's someone in particular I want."

"As you wish. Near?"

The younger of the two shook his head. "I have no preferences."

L nodded once. He allowed his gaze to lock with Mello's again, but it wasn't in a challenge. He simply tilted his head to the side, his dark hair flopping halfway over his face, and asked, "Who do you wish to bring with you?"

Mello glanced at Roger, but went on anyway without waiting for his permission. "Can I go and get him? He should know what's going on, right?" As soon as Roger and L agreed, Mello darted out of the door and down the hallway. L chuckled softly and helped himself to a chair in the corner of the office. He settled into his comfortable crouch, letting out a quiet sigh as he fell into the familiar position.

Within minutes, Mello returned with a boy of his age at his side; L couldn't help being impressed by his punctuality. The young man pushed his goggles up onto his forehead as he followed Mello into the room, raising an eyebrow at the gathering. His hair was a sort of copper colour, but leaning more towards brown than red. There was an almost lazy edge to the way he glanced L over then shrugged him off, casting a longing glance at the handheld game he was holding. He sighed, and then pocketed it. "What have I done this time?"

"Nothing, Matt," Roger replied, waving a hand. There was a sort of sadly amused smile on his face, one that L couldn't quite interpret. "Mello, have you…?" he trailed off when he noticed L's outstretched hand, changing track quickly. "What is it?"

"Matt's file please, Roger."

The boy raised his eyebrows but didn't comment. Mello stood with his arms folded next to Matt, his chin raised, and directed an almost challenging stare at L. As soon as Roger placed the folder in L's hand, he flipped through it, scanning the pages.

Mello had certainly made a good choice. Matt was third in the rankings, just below Near and Mello themselves. Judging by the fact that Mello was looking so defensive while L read the papers, he must be close to him and trust him fully. He closed the file with a snap and passed it back over to Roger.

"Well?" Mello immediately demanded. Matt elbowed Mello not-so-subtly, no doubt in an attempt to get him to be less… _Mello_. The boy only jabbed him in the ribs in return, though there was a small smile on his lips.

"I approve," L replied simply. He slid off of his seat, standing again. "I'll leave you to explain things to him, Mello. You three have until the end of the week to prepare, and then it will be straight into preparation for the case." He turned to Roger and added, "Is there a spare room I can use while I wait?"

"Yes, of course. Mello, would you mind showing him…?"

L tuned out Mello's grumbling, silently following him through the maze of corridors to one of the older, more unused bedrooms at Wammy's. He declined the invitation to dinner that Mello gave him – although, L had the feeling that he was just trying to be polite rather than actually being interested in sharing a meal with him. Mello excused himself quickly and went to find Matt again. Only once he was alone did L finally allow himself to mourn properly for the loss of Watari, for Light's happiness, and for his own feelings.

* * *

It took a while for Light to fully come back to himself after L's death, and even then he wasn't entirely the old Light Yagami. He didn't let himself think about how the detective would react if he knew what he was planning on doing; that wouldn't help matters at all. Light wouldn't allow it.

No, that was wrong. _Kira_ wouldn't allow it.

The pain hit him with more force than he thought possible. The Task Force put aside a day to grieve for L and Watari, but refused to give themselves anymore. Light was forced to put on a normal façade in order to hide what had been going on between him and L; as much as he'd have preferred to spend longer getting over L's death, he couldn't afford to appear any more upset by it than anyone else. It was with a heavy heart that Light pulled himself back into Task Force duties.

It didn't take the Task Force long to decide who they wanted to replace L. The choice was obvious to them. The man himself had recommended Light months ago, should anything happen to him, and now they wanted that to happen.

It wasn't as simple as that for Light.

He was torn. It would feel wrong to him to be called 'L', to take his place, to _act_ as him. And yet Kira urged him to seize this opportunity. He wouldn't get another one like it, would he? Anyway, L wasn't around to watch him complete his vision for the world.

In the end, Light accepted.

Of course, this also meant that he was fully willing to take his place as Kira once more.

He managed to catch up with Misa soon after, who was overjoyed to see him again. Light gave her his instructions the first time they met up.

_'Misa, I want you to dig something up at the location I'm about to tell you. And make sure nobody is watching you when you do it.'_

It was the other notebook. He'd buried it and left it with a message for Misa. Looking back, he recalled that there was a part of the end of the letter that he regretted now, but there was nothing he could do to change it. He would just have to go along with it. There was nothing stopping him from doing so, anyway. Most of it was utter rubbish, considering that L was dead, but Misa was unaware of that fact. Hopefully, she would be smart and go with the unspoken Plan B.

The instructions Misa found went like this:

_By the time you read this letter, you should have remembered everything.  
__Do you remember my friend you met when you came to visit at To-oh University? He called himself Hideki Ryuga, but you saw his name as something else. I want you to write his name in this notebook and kill him. But if you do it right after reading this letter, it will be immediately after you and I are given our freedom. So don't kill him until I give you the order to do so.  
__Please burn this letter immediately and only take with you a number of notebook pages that you can get rid of quickly. Hide the pages on you and rebury the notebook here. And when you see me again, touch me with a piece of the notebook, and make it look casual.  
__If you do this, I will love you forever.  
__Light Yagami_

Most of all, Light regretted the last part. It was giving Misa the hope that he could love her, which he didn't, and doubted he would ever be able to. Light's heart was long beyond repair now. But there was no taking back what he'd put into the letter, so Light simply accepted his fate.

It was a good price to pay, though; Misa traded another half of her lifespan for the Shinigami Eyes, just as he'd hoped. Also, she managed to brush his hand with a small corner of the notebook when they went out again, allowing him to see Ryuk, the Shinigami he'd originally been haunted by.

Naturally, Ryuk's first words to Light were, "Aren't things going to get boring now L's not around?"

If Light hadn't been thrown off by Ryuk's greeting, he might have noticed the humour in the Shinigami's voice, as well as the glimmer of amusement in his odd eyes. But, then again, Ryuk often appeared to be laughing, so it was easily missed. Light had no idea that Ryuk knew of L's true fate and he didn't ask. He'd seen the detective die in front of him, and that was confirmation enough for him.

As Light and Misa walked down a street towards a nearby coffee shop, Ryuk floated behind them, waiting for Light's answer. Surprising even himself, the corners of Light's lips curled upwards in a small smirk. He'd barely smiled after L's death; it was fitting that the first one that would grace his features would be one tainted by Kira. "Of course not, Ryuk. From now on, I'll show you the creation of the new world."

The Shinigami barked a laugh and gave his ragged wings a flap, propelling himself forwards until he could get a good look at Light's face. He flew backwards, almost appearing to swim in the air. "Oh?"

"There are a lot of idiots out there," Light explained, waving a hand to gesture at the world around them. "It's not like everyone is on Kira's side now that L's gone." Light paused when his chest gave a painful throb. He locked the feeling away before it could do much damage to his act. "Now the second battle begins. There's still a lot of work to do."


	3. Interlude

**Author's note: Apologies for the delay! I've been busy. The posting schedule should be back to normal this week, though. **

**This chapter is short and just an interlude. Next chapter we'll be back to the normal length. Enjoy!**

* * *

Four years passed. One would think that L would give up on his mission to save Light, or the boy would forget his affection for the detective, but that assumption would be wrong. Over time, it only strengthened, and with it there was pain. Light buried his broken heart beneath the desire to recreate the world; it helped him to cope, to stay strong. He could manage to keep himself distracted for long periods of time, but now and again the realisation that L was no longer there would crush him. He allowed himself to show his sorrow only when he was acting as Light Yagami, when he was with the Task Force, as it gave him an opportunity to release his bottled-up emotions, but this had to fade over time or the Task Force would begin to suspect things, wouldn't they? However, when he was alone, Kira consumed him.

L, on the other hand, became an almost Watari-like figure for Mello and Near. Much to Mello's irritation, he and the other boy fitted together like the puzzles Near enjoyed to form the new L. The man himself merely served as their mentor. All three kept to their parts of the agreement that had been laid down at the beginning, and they began to work efficiently, like a well-oiled machine. And while Mello and Near were working together, they were also separate, each heading his own investigation while sharing information with the other.

In those four years, Mello and Near grew into young men. Mello was nearing his twenties by the time the battle between Kira and L came to a head again, while Near was just seventeen. Their ages were not a problem, though; L stepped in when they needed access to this piece of information, or that file on the Kira Case, and through him they were allowed what they needed.

Near and Mello were to have three people each on their team, not including them.

For Near, L got in contact with some of the best people he could find to give the younger boy the group he needed. Those three were Anthony Rester, a sort of guardian for Near; Stephen Gevanni, a person known in Near's team for his skills at tailing suspects and picking locks; and finally Halle Lidner, a woman who, like Rester, also possessed the ability to be an exceptional bodyguard. Near approved of them, and then L needed to complete Mello's group. The surnames of these three were aliases.

The young man had already selected one person for himself: Matt, his closest friend at Wammy's and, L later found out, a boy Mello was more than friends with. L was pleased to see that Mello's choice wasn't simply out of the desire to keep Matt near to him; Matt proved to be an excellent hacker, as well as the only solution to cooling Mello's anger when it sparked. As for the other two, Mello announced, "I couldn't care less", and left it to L.

He knew for a fact that Mello would only be satisfied with people who would listen to him, so anyone who had a history of disobedience was out instantly. Luckily, he managed to track down two people that were suitable.

First was Wren. She was a thin, lean woman, and her nimble fingers were brilliant for creating explosives. She could make anything from delicate triggers to colourful flames. It transpired that Wren had actually attended Wammy's House, but she had left long before Mello had even set foot there, so he wouldn't know her.

The other was Lynx. While he had not been to Wammy's, when L had contacted him he had decided that he liked the idea of a single name as an alias – like Wren, Matt and Mello – and had adopted that. Like Rester, Lynx's duty was to be a bodyguard for Mello and, if need be, stop him from doing anything idiotic. Rather than being ordered around by Mello, Lynx listened to L more in terms of his actions. L knew how Mello acted, and told Lynx the moment he arrived that he was to keep him from leaving; L couldn't afford to let Mello die.

With the teams complete, L could relax for a short while.

Light, on the other hand, was not so laidback.

He spent his time making sure the world knew of Kira's existence. By the time the four years had passed, the planet was in his control. Kira was worshipped, revered and feared by all.

Light had spared some time to tie up some loose ends, too. Amongst them was Wedy and Aiber, otherwise known as Mary Kenwood and Thierry Montello. They were killed by a motorcycle accident and liver cancer respectively but, of course, the true cause was Kira.

Next to go were the remaining members of the Yotsuba group. Takeshi Ooi, Masahiko Kida, Suguru Shimura, Eiichi Takahashi, Reiji Namikawa and Shingo Mido all died of heart attacks.

And Light didn't stop there.

As L, on May the 1st 2005, he requested that all police and media refrained from making suspected criminals' faces public. It was put into effect within two weeks all over the world.

Quickly after, information on criminals began to flood the internet, as if Kira requested it. That wasn't exactly true, but it was exactly how Light wanted things to proceed.

And, meanwhile, Light continued to play the roles of both Kira and L.

On March 5th 2009, Near made his first move on the chessboard. With L's help, he set up the headquarters for his team. Mello was to share the building, but he and his group were on a different floor, with L's between them. Near rebuilt the information on the Kira Case from scratch, as L wouldn't breathe a word – he didn't trust his judgement, and suspected that it would be clouded by his feelings for Light – and at their mentor's request, Near shared it all with Mello.

In the April of 2009, Light Yagami, now twenty-three years old, joined the NPA as a member of the Intelligence and Information Bureau.

In the summer of that year, the world's reaction to Kira began gaining momentum. The world's reaction to Kira was split between those who scurried into the shadows in fear and those that offered him support. As time passed, the latter started to stamp out the former.

Lastly, not only did some people claim that 'Kira is justice', but some countries even accepted him. The world was turning into a place where Kira was taking L's place as the law.


	4. Chapter 3

**Author's note: And now it's back into the swing of the story.**

**Here's a question from a guest reviewer, Nana Banana: How does in this story Light manage to off Aiber and Wedy since L announces to them he believes Light is Kira and is planning on faking his death?**

**Thank you for your question. Now, Wedy and Aiber are smart, there's no question about that. They managed to gain L's trust, after all, and they'd have to be pretty special to do that. There had to be a reason behind L faking his death, and though he didn't explain it, they knew better than to do anything that might interfere with his plan. And besides, by this point Light will soon have access to all of the luxuries that Ryuzaki has as L; he's bound to have the ability to discover their true names in time. I didn't go into detail too much in this, because it isn't essential to the story.**

**Enjoy the chapter!**

* * *

Light was sitting in the living room of the Yagami home, attempting to enjoy the company of his family, Misa and Matsuda. Unbeknownst to most of the humans in the room, a Shinigami lingered behind Light, watching the proceedings with a half-curious, half-bored expression on his twisted features. Ryuk's gaze often drifted across the room to linger on a bowl of apples that sat on the table, but he knew better than to swoop across and scoop one up. Still, he couldn't help letting his eyes wander; he was incredibly bored with this trivial human conversation, after all.

Although, it was quite amusing to see Misa attempt the human interaction called _flirting _with Light.

While Light was well aware that Misa wasn't satisfied with 'just friends', he couldn't bring himself to allow her any closer, even for Kira's goal. He had, however, moved in together with her, which had pleased her. Misa clearly wanted more than friendship, but out of the affection she still felt for Light, she didn't press him, for which he was grateful. Light couldn't quite stop himself from recoiling slightly whenever another person tried to touch him with romantic intentions.

Light, Soichiro and Matsuda were deep in a conversation concerning the Kira Case. Misa often followed Light around these days and he didn't mind, not really; as the Second Kira, he could rely on her somewhat. It was good to have someone that he could trust with him.

A bonus of bringing her to his family's home, was she could listen in on conversations about Kira. His parents didn't mind, as they knew how close Light and Misa supposedly were. Light was certain that his parents still secretly hoped that they would go into a relationship again.

"Unfortunately," Soichiro rumbled in his deep voice, "we can't stop what's on the internet. The Kira Case sure is running cold lately…"

"I can't believe those people that put names on the internet so they can be killed," Matsuda snorted. "_Those_ are the people who should die! But Kira does seem to be using some of the info…"

"You're so contradictory, Matsu," Misa giggled.

"Some might believe that the world has changed into a better place for good people," Light added, shrugging.

Sachiko tutted as she passed, frowning at her husband and son. "Discussing this again? Please stop, dear. You too, Light. It's hardly pleasant conversation. You'd both do well to give it a rest now and again."

"Sorry," Light apologised, ignoring Ryuk's cackles from behind him.

"Look at that, listening to your mother," the Shinigami teased.

The conversation didn't have any time to lull, however, as the sound of the front door shutting announced Sayu's return. "I'm home!" she called, padding into the living room. A smile spread across her face when she saw her brother. "Light! And Misa! It's rare that you both come over." Misa waved in return eagerly, as always.

When Sayu turned to greet Matsuda, the effect she had on him was enough to amuse the whole room. "Matsuda, was it? Long time no see." She gave him a warm smile.

Matsuda blushed furiously and twisted in his seat to face her easier. "S-Sayu! You're all grown up… Last time I saw you, you were like this." He hovered his hand at about the height of the armchair he was sitting on. The officer made no attempt to stop a goofy grin from spreading across his face as he spoke - he didn't realise it was even there.

Misa laughed and threw a hand out to point at him. "Ha, ha, ha! You've gone bright red, Matsu!"

This, of course, only made the poor man's cheeks flush even more. "H-hey! I'm- I don't- I'm not-"

He was cut off by Soichiro's gruff snort. The older man pushed his glasses further up his nose and growled, "There's no way I'm letting Sayu get into a relationship with a cop."

Ignoring the mutters of her parents and Matsuda's continued spluttering, Sayu laughed and said, "Well, I think you're quite handsome, Matsuda." He actually choked on his own babbling, but then it cut off with a choke when Sayu continued with, "If only you weren't so old, I might consider going out with you. Too bad."

Light chuckled. "Good one, Sayu."

"Yeah, she's more of an adult than Matsu!" Misa agreed.

"So, Misa," Sachiko said, smiling at the actress, "I heard you're going to be in a Hollywood movie next. Good luck!"

"Thanks!" Misa beamed at Light's mother. "I'll do my best!"

Sayu laughed lightly again. "I have a paper due tomorrow, so… Enjoy yourselves, Matsuda and Misa." There was a chorus of 'bye, Sayu!' as she disappeared upstairs. Misa called, "We should meet up sometime!" after her. Matsuda stared wistfully at the doorway where she'd been standing, and let out a heavy sigh.

"I wonder if she has a boyfriend yet…"

"Of course not!" Soichiro shot a glare at the younger police officer. Clearly, Matsuda hadn't got the 'no boyfriend of Sayu's will be a police officer' message. But before he could continue, his phone alerted him to a new call, so Soichiro excused himself and answered it. "What is it, Aizawa?"

Light glanced up, his interest sparked. Why would Aizawa be contacting Soichiro on his day off? It had to be important.

He didn't have to wait long to find out why Aizawa was phoning.

"_Kidnapped?_" Soichiro gasped. His gaze fixed with Light's, and they exchanged a slight nod. His father lowered his voice and murmured, "No, no, we shouldn't talk here…I'm at home... But if it's true, then it calls for the entire force to act…" There was a brief pause. "I understand. We're on our way."

He stood, reached for his coat and shrugged it on. "Light, Matsuda, come with me."

The three of them hurriedly said their goodbyes and darted out of the door. Misa looked a little bit surprised, but Sachiko was just resigned. "You can stay here while they're out, if you like, Misa. It'll be nice to have some company."

Misa beamed at her. "Thanks!"

Soichiro didn't tell Light or Matsuda just who had been kidnapped until they had reached the station, and even then he didn't utter a word until the members of the Kira Task Force were gathered around him. It took some persuasion to get it out of him. The Deputy Director looked troubled; there were creases in his face from worry, and his arms were folded in an almost defensive stance.

"Dad, who was kidnapped?" Light prompted. Aizawa, Mogi, Matsuda and Ide echoed the question.

Soichiro hesitated, clearly uneasy. "NPA Director Takimura."

* * *

Technically, Mello was breaking the law by kidnapping Director Takimura. In the long run, though, it was for a good cause, wasn't it? He _was_ aiming to stop Kira, after all. Surely that would be a good enough reason for anyone who objected.

As much as Mello looked up to L, he doubted his mentor would be pleased with his actions, so he had neglected to tell him. He hoped that if L discovered this, he wouldn't be too angry.

Well, if L could even summon the energy to feel anything at all.

He descended the stairs to the basement of the headquarters L had provided him and Near with. His heavy boots clunked on the stairs as he went down them, and Lynx followed closley behind, as quiet as ever. Wren was back upstairs somewhere relaxing, and the last time Mello had seen Matt, he'd still been in bed.

The Director was tied to a chair in the centre of the room, the only light in the dark room shining over him. Mello halted in front of him, his lip curling as he watched the man raise his head. The conditions of the room were fairly good, even for a basement; there was no damp, no rats scurrying across the ground, and the temperature down there was comfortable. Really, as basements went, this was quite luxurious.

Mello was a young man now, and a fine one at that, but his aging had done nothing to improve his temper. The only three people that could stand to be around him for very long were Matt, L and Near – not that Mello appreciated the latter two. His hair was even shaggier than before, barely cut, and his style of clothing had changed, too. Mello now favoured leather over baggy cotton shirts.

Near hadn't changed a bit. Neither had Matt, really, aside from his now near-perfect hacking skills.

"He say anything yet?" Mello asked, tilting his head towards Lynx.

The older man shook his head slowly. "Not much." Lynx wasn't entirely in favour of Mello's decision, but the younger one of the two was the boss. His pale green eyes slid over the Director and onto the back of Mello's head, a very small frown on his brow.

"What did you get?"

"The Japanese police are so afraid of Kira that the only ones working with L currently are Deputy Director Soichiro Yagami, Kanzo Mogi and Tota Matsuda. And even though he's the NPA Director," Lynx nodded towards the bound man, "he didn't know about the notebook."

Mello was silent for a moment. He raised a bar of chocolate to his mouth – a sweet of which he was quite fond – and broke off a piece between his teeth. After taking his time chewing and swallowing, savouring the taste as he ate, he eventually asked, "So out of those three, the one that would have the most influence would be Yagami, correct?"

"Yes," the Director rasped, his voice hoarse.

Mello made a soft _hm_ sound and his blue eyes sharpened. "Lynx, listen up."

"Yes, sir."

"Near is going to end up finding out about the notebook one way or another – he's probably got something in place to work it out. He's gonna try and get the notebook, I can guarantee it, and if he gets to it first we don't stand a chance." Mello was all about the competition. To get the notebook first was to gain L's favour, which he desperately wanted. He couldn't allow Near to beat him, not again; after staying in second at Wammy's House, Mello was determined to come in first in the real world. "The way I see it, there are two notebooks: one with Kira and one with the NPA."

He paused, glancing over his shoulder at Lynx with a grin that verged on feral. "We'll take them both!"

Mello decided not to tell Near about his plans, which wasn't technically against the rules; only L was the one who needed to know. And if he was honest, Mello wasn't entirely sure that he wanted to tell him; L wasn't the man he'd been when he'd met them at Wammy's House. As time had passed, he'd drawn into himself, becoming more reclusive than before.

Nobody was quite sure how to ask him if he was in any condition to be acting as Watari, so they simply left him to it.

* * *

One of the floors of the building was dedicated to leisure. Long, leather sofas stretched out across the room, complete with plush cushions, and there were large televisions on the walls with the odd gaming system linked to them. There was even a bookshelf that was full to the brim with volumes of all kinds. Matt was slumped on one end of the sofa, tapping away at a DS in his hands, while Mello stretched his feet across his lap. The blonde had his eyes closed and there was actually a peaceful smile on his lips.

Near had never set foot there, and he didn't intend to. He got his entertainment from toys and the case.

He was focused on the hunt for Kira. Upon hearing of the NPA Director's kidnapping, he'd instantly sent in one of his own team – Rester – to investigate the situation. With L's assistance, he had no trouble in infiltrating the NPA building to reach Deputy Soichiro.

But the longer the conversation went on, the more Near felt suspicion sneaking in the back of his mind. He could picture the situation like a chessboard in his mind, and he had the feeling that he knew exactly who the other player was. Daring moves and risks would force them to slip up sooner or later.

Near wasn't one to jump to conclusions, however, so he gave his rival the benefit of the doubt.

He flicked his grey eyes up as Mello suddenly darted down the stairs, Lynx and Matt hot on his heels. Tilting his head to the side, Near reached up and twisted a stray white curl around his finger. The sound of their footsteps echoing bounced back long after they'd disappeared down the next flight, hammering down the stairs as if their lives depended on it.

As curious as he was, Near stayed put. He had a conversation to listen to, one that was becoming more interesting by the minute. The price for Director Takimura's life was the notebook that was in the NPA's possession, but Soichiro Yagami also refused to hand it over to Rester.

Near told Rester to pass on his interest in helping recover the Director to Deputy Soichiro.

* * *

It turned out that that wasn't needed.

The reason Lynx had come to collect Mello and Matt was because the Director had managed to hang himself with his own necktie.

The three of them stood around the body, and Matt whistled between his teeth. "Bad luck, Mells. No use in keeping a dead hostage."

Mello glanced over at his boyfriend – for lack of a better word, he really didn't think the term 'boyfriend' described what he and Matt were quite well enough – and grinned. "No, this is fine."

_If Kira was the one who killed Takimura, Kira can't touch us since he doesn't know our names and faces, thus he went after Takimura. So, Kira is someone who knows about the kidnapping… Yeah, it's possible it was just a suicide, but…_

_ I don't think so._

"This makes things better," he chuckled, nipping at a half-broken square of chocolate from the bar he already had open. "Kidnap Soichiro Yagami's daughter next!"

Matt pressed his lips together to stop himself from smirking. He was more of a neutral person in this battle; he wasn't really fussed what happened in the end, as long as Mello didn't go on a rampage or get himself killed. He'd already had to head off a few arguments between Mello and Near – though they were more one-sided than anything else; Near just sat there impassively, giving Mello a look that clearly said _Are you finished yet?, _which only served to infuriate Mello further.

"But what's the point in all this, sir?" Lynx asked. Matt had to admire the man's bravery. "It's just a notebook. If you don't get hold of it, Near will-"

Mello cut him off with a real, genuine growl. "It's more than just a notebook. I want Kira's head. _I want to_ _beat Near._" He scrunched up the foil of the chocolate wrapper and tossed it to the side. "Lynx, get rid of the body. Don't let any of the others see," he commanded.

The older man obeyed without question. Mello then turned to Matt, and while his tone remained firm, there was a slight softening of his expression that was reserved just for him. "Matt, pass me your phone, please."

Mello quickly dialled and held it to his ear, flicking his hair back so it was out of the way. He tapped his boot impatiently while he waited, and when Soichiro picked up, a grin spread across his face.

_"Yagami speaking."_

"Mr. Deputy Director. About the trade of the Director for the notebook… it's been cancelled."

_"What?!"_

"Takimura is dead."

_"Y-you…"_

"But what has been cancelled is the Director's part. The trade is still on. The notebook will now be swapped for Sayu Yagami."

Shocked silence from Soichiro's end.

Mello continued, really smiling now, his lips pulled back to bare his teeth.

"You're the Deputy Director of the NPA, so I guess it's ridiculous of me to tell you not to alert the police. But we'd like it if you'd move on this on your own. I'll now send you a picture of Takimura's corpse. Take a good look and we'll call again tomorrow."

As Mello ended the call, he had just enough time to hear a few shouts, before it cut off and went to static.


	5. Chapter 4

**Author's note: I apologise for the gaps between updates in this fic. I've decided that I'm going to make the update window for this fic between one to two weeks now, though. Because I'm following the storyline but changing little parts, I need to take care to not change anything that could possibly leave me stranded in the middle of the story with something horribly wrong. I also want to do this fic justice, and that's why I've made this decision. ****Thank you. **

* * *

"_The notebook will now be swapped for Sayu Yagami."_

Light's blood ran cold. Their enemy wasn't an idiot then, if he knew exactly where to hit them. With two members of her family in one small group, and with the others being close family friends, it would be nearly impossible for them to refuse to hand over the notebook.

Light couldn't deny that it was clever.

While the Task Force stood in stunned silence – all apart from Matsuda, who was barely able to keep himself from panicking over Sayu's disappearance – Light called one of her friends. However, it gave him very little in the way of a trail. When his father looked up hopefully, Light simply told him what Sayu's friend had said. "She emailed a friend at twelve-forty, and was in her third class. So up until about three o'clock…" Light's voice faded; Soichiro wasn't paying the slightest bit of attention.

"Dad? Are you alright?"

"What? Yes, I'm fine. Don't worry about me."

Ide had joined them recently, and despite not having spent very long in the company of his colleagues for very long, he could easily tell that Soichiro was lying through his teeth. "Hang in there, Deputy Director," he encouraged, patting him on the back. "Technically, you're the head of the NPA now."

"Ide," Aizawa warned.

But Soichiro shrugged off Ide's hand and raised his head fractionally. "No, he's right, Aizawa. I shouldn't allow myself to get bogged down in emotions."

"Should I alert the other departments, sir?" Ide asked, turning his attention back to Soichiro. "About the Director's death and your daughter's kidnapping?"

"Ide!" Matsuda yelped. He scrambled forwards, weaving through the other members of the Task Force to reach the older man. "What are you talking about?! 'If the police make a move, we'll kill her'. You heard what they said!"

For once, Aizawa agreed. "You said it yourself, Ide; the Deputy Director is the head of the NPA now. We follow his orders."

"This isn't like you," Ide growled, shooting a glance at Aizawa. "When the Director was kidnapped, the Deputy Director told us to let the other departments know immediately. He can't change his mind just because his family is involved!"

Soichiro grimaced and leaned on the nearest desk, bowing his head. "You're right… If I changed my position just because she's my daughter, I would be a failure as a police officer… Send word to-"

"You're wrong, Dad."

As one, the heads of the four men turned to Light. He'd swivelled his chair around to face the room, and had a look on his face that resembled the one L used to have when he was deep in thought. Light, of course, didn't notice this – he was far too busy planning ahead – but the Task Force noted this change silently.

"We need to put more thought into this," he elaborated. "We all need to calm down. We won't do any good if we make a rash decision."

Light stood, folded his arms and raised one hand to tap his chin. He paced across the room, brow furrowed. "I have an idea… Admittedly, it's only hypothetical, but whoever killed the Director probably wasn't the kidnappers. It was Kira."

"How'd you get that?" Matsuda questioned, sounding lost. But, then again, that wasn't anything new for poor Matsuda.

Light was silent for a long moment as he gathered his thoughts. He returned to his seat and pressed his hands together in a steeple-like pose over the desk. Eventually, he breathed, "Ok…"

He raised his voice above the whisper it had been so they could all hear him. "If we start to think that one of us is giving Kira information, we'll never get anything done. I'm going to trust everyone here. I'm sorry to say that we probably can't trust the whole police force, though."

There were no protests, so Light continued.

"Think about it," he encouraged, turning to gesture at them. "What would the kidnappers gain by killing the Director? Maybe they wanted to prove that they were serious, but there was no need to _kill_ him. Torture would have sufficed. Also, in the phone call, they said '_the Director is_ _dead_', not '_we killed the Director_'."

He shrugged, letting his hands drop back to his sides. "Kira must have heard of the Director's kidnapping when we sent out word of it. That's the only thing I can think of.

"With Higuchi dead, it's highly likely that Kira's realised the NPA has the notebook; he's not an idiot, we all know that. Even the man who came to offer help – Rester, wasn't it? – and the kidnappers knew about it. Kira _must_ have been able to figure out why the Director was kidnapped."

Still, the Task Force offered nothing in the way of speech, which Light found helpful; the sooner he planted these thoughts in their minds, the quicker he could get Sayu home. With a pang, Light realised that if he hadn't fallen for L, he probably would have cared less about his sister in this moment.

Light was pleased to hear that his voice was steady when he picked up again. "Kira is a murderer who poses as an icon of justice. He doesn't want the Death Note to get into the hands of criminals. To him, the notebook is better off with the police. Kira must already have one of his own, so he doesn't need the one we have."

"Oh," Matsuda breathed, his expression clearing. "So that's why the Director died."

"Yes, that's what I think," Light agreed.

Ryuk had been lurking over Light's shoulder the entire time, but this was the first moment he spoke up. The Shinigami had been chuckling to himself throughout Light's speech, and he explained just why to the human. "Well, it's the truth, isn't it?" he said simply, adding a quiet cackle.

Light ignored him. Even if the others hadn't been around, he would have blanked him out.

"That's one way to look at it…" Ide admitted.

"However," Light added, "it's also a clue that could lead us to Kira. We couldn't connect anyone in the police department to Kira after L's death. But there's a chance that the person has infiltrated the police again. That's not helpful for that person, though; even Kira doesn't know where it's hidden, or that my father is the only person who knows where it really is. If Kira doesn't want the notebook in the open, all he has to do is kill my father." Light punctuated this by pointing at Soichiro. This couldn't have been good for his health; Light felt a flicker of worry for his father's heart again, but pushed it aside. Soichiro had been fine for a long time, and there had been no lingering side-effects of his heart attack.

"It's not impossible that someone could find the hidden notebook later on," Light continued, after a brief shake of his head to clear it of distracting thoughts, "but nobody would know it existed if Kira just killed us. This is the Kira that killed the seven people in the Yotsuba group. He wouldn't have any qualms about killing us. But as justice, he can't just kill everyone in the police department."

There was a pause as the Task Force took this all in.

Aizawa sighed heavily and ran a hand over his face, tugging his fingers through his hair. "I see… so if that's true, Kira or the snitch isn't one of us."

"Exactly. Kira is a civilian that's getting police information from somewhere else." Light could almost feel Ryuk leaning over his shoulder in a bid to distract him, but he ignored the Shinigami. "So is Kira very well informed about police business…? Or is he breaking into the database for information…? Either way, if we send word out to every department, Kira will probably hear about it."

"Oh." Ide's expression cleared, and he nodded. The Task Force glanced at him, and he explained, "What Light is saying, is if we mention Sayu's kidnapping to the rest of the force, there's a chance Kira will hear about it and kill her, too."

"The possibility is there, but the chance is still high," Light warned. He flattened his linked fingers and propped his chin up on top of them, creating a sort of platform for him to lean his weight on. "Since the kidnapper is trying to get the notebook, I think we should treat this as part of the Kira investigation. We're the only ones who know about the Death Note, so we should be the only ones to investigate this."

Aizawa grimaced and dropped into his seat heavily. "Then I guess we'll just have to tell them that the Director's dead and we're chasing the killer…"

"Yeah, we won't be able to hide his death…" Matsuda looked worried, but he didn't elaborate. He just folded his hands and pressed his face against them, frowning.

And then Ide, ever the focused one, took charge by saying, "Meanwhile we'll keep negotiating the exchange."

While the men discussed the situation amongst themselves, Light finally tuned into hear what Ryuk had to say. "_Hyuk, hyuk, hyuk_," he cackled, leaning over Light's shoulder to leer at him. "Nice escape. If the whole police force moved, your sister might've ended up dead… Guess you have another soft spot, huh?"

Another reference, another stab of pain in his chest. Light swallowed past the sudden lump in his throat, forcibly shoving any thoughts relating to a certain messy-haired detective away - for the moment. Clearing his throat, both to remove that stubborn choked feeling and to get the attention of the Task Force, Light turned to his father.

"It's your choice, Dad." He stood, sock-covered feet sliding on the tiled floor a little. "Please make your decision carefully," he said, directing this at all of them. "We won't be able to do anything unless we're on the same page."

Ide and Matsuda made sounds of agreement as Light headed towards his room down the hall. "I'll think it over, too. I'm going to now, I just need to cool my head for a while…"

It was a relief to be in his room. It was perfectly silent, apart from the now-quiet voices of the Task Force back in the main room. Light locked the door, pressed his back to it and slid down to sit on the floor. His head thumped back against the wood, and he let out a long sigh. He closed his eyes.

He could almost imagine L sitting next to him, the same as he had been years ago, hunched over with his knees curled against his chest. Those owlish eyes would blink at him, and he would mumble something that was an attempt at comfort, but would probably fail and yet it would make Light smile anyway.

God, he missed L. Only now did Light realise that he'd loved him.

Light squeezed his eyes shut tighter. "I miss you," he whispered to his room. A small part of him was tentatively hopeful that L really would be sitting next to him. Light cracked open his eyes again.

He was alone. Even Ryuk had stayed away.

Light buried his face in his hands.

* * *

"What have you_ done?"_

L honestly couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so much emotion. It had been a long time since anger had seared a path through his veins, and now it burned through him, making his muscles tense with the need to relieve his frustration _somehow._

His eyes, usually so cool and grey, were now stormy as he stared at the eldest of his two heirs. Mello stood before him, lip curled and arms folded in a defensive position across his chest. He saw Mello glance at the door to the room, as if he could summon Matt just like that; L had told Mello to come alone and Mello had obliged, albeit reluctantly.

He would only disobey him if he had a good reason, L tried to remind himself, but this was no excuse.

L's floor was mostly bare. His office, the area out front, had a simple desk, chair and laptop, with a filing cabinet in the corner. The walls and floor were the same as they had been at the Task Force Headquarters: white, tiled and shining. The rooms at the back that made up L's quarters had barely any personal items about the place. The most that there was, was a bowl of sweets, but then they were in every room he frequented.

L had left his chair in favour of standing before Mello. The boy was as tall as him now when he was slouched.

Mello raised his chin, defiance in every line of his face. "I'm working Kira out into the open," he replied curtly, working to keep a polite tone. "That's what you want, isn't it?"

"Yes, of course it is." L was having more success at levelling out his voice than Mello was – then again, mild irritation seemed to be Mello's most common emotion. "Kidnapping a young girl is not the way to go about it. I thought I told you to inform me of any decisions you wished to make?"

"But then you would have stopped me!" Mello's arms dropped, and he took a step forward into L's space.

This was when L moved his shoulders back, pulled himself out of his poor standing position. It gave him the precious few inches needed to be taller than Mello again. The boy blinked, seemed to reconsider his decision and shuffled back a few centimetres.

"Bringing innocent people into this is not how we do things," L reprimanded. He stared Mello down and, eventually, his heir averted his gaze. "We follow the law, Mello, because we _are_ the law. By breaking it, we are doing the same as Kira: ignoring it for our own purposes, no matter how just they might seem in our own minds. I want you to release Sayu Yagami and find a new way of discovering Kira's identity."

L turned on his heel, his back slipping back into its familiar hunch. He made to return to his seat, a clear dismissal for Mello, but the boy didn't move. L glanced back, a mixture of concern and suspicion flickering over his features.

"I… I can't do that."

L paused. "And why not?"

"Because she's not here. I hired some extra help for this. She's already out on location, ready for the trade." Mello's voice hardened as he added, "And I won't stop it now when we can have our hands on a notebook."

That was when Mello nodded stiffly and left. If he wanted to go on his own terms, that was fine.

What wasn't fine was that as soon as he had made his exit, L seated himself in his chair and fixed his gaze on his knees, pressing his lips into a thin line. As much as he wanted to help Sayu, it seemed that Mello, at least, was on the right track by kidnapping her.

"I'm sorry, Light-kun," L murmured, "but I need to be certain that you are not Kira." He hesitated, before silently adding, _Please prove me wrong for once._


	6. Chapter 5

**Author's note: I'm sorry about the delay, but that will be explained on my profile. If you guys wouldn't mind taking a look, I've explained my new update schedule that's in effect for all of my fics. Thank you :)**

* * *

There were three notebooks in the human world. One was in Misa's possession, and the Shinigami attached to her was Ryuk. However, that notebook was buried, and Misa only had a few pages of it.

The second used to be Rem's Death Note. But, because she died and left it in the human realm, it belonged to Light, as he was the first to touch it.

The third used to be Ryuk's, the notebook Light started off with. Ryuk and Rem switched notebooks and it became Rem's before being passed onto Higuchi. It was currently in the hiding place Soichiro had chosen for it.

Light pondered all of this one evening. The Task Force had gone home, leaving him, Misa and Ryuk in their shared apartment. Misa had wandered into the living room to find Light seated on the sofa, leaning forwards with his hands clasped beneath his chin, deep in thought. She'd dropped into the seat next to him and flicked on the television, almost ignoring him.

The two of them had an easy friendship now. Light could almost imagine her becoming his real partner.

Almost.

He sat back against the cushions, rapidly blinking as his thoughts cleared. Light glanced over his shoulder to catch Ryuk's eyes. The Shinigami moved his gaze away from the mindless supposed comedy Misa was entertaining herself with, and turned his attention to Light. He cocked his head to the side in silent question.

"Who is the current owner of the Death Note hidden by my father?" he murmured quietly, not wishing to disturb Misa.

Ryuk was silent for a while anyway, a mixture of emotions passing over his twisted features – confusion, speculation, and finally something that was almost resigned.

"Did you ever relinquish ownership of it?" he rasped. "Even if you didn't, it's been with Soichiro for a while, so maybe it's passed to him…"

Light clicked his tongue and glanced away again. "I wish Rem was the one who survived…"

It turned out that Misa had been listening into the conversation after all, because she piped up to give her view of the situation. "That notebook used to be Rem's, so now that she's dead it shouldn't make a difference, right? Whoever's got it is the owner of it."

Even if the enemy got hold of the notebook, they shouldn't be able to trade for the Shinigami Eyes, which meant Light had the upper hand; Misa had traded for another half of her lifespan when she retrieved a handful of pages of the notebook.

Whatever he decided, Light needed to get his hands on all three of the notebooks, or at least have them somewhere they wouldn't be used against him.

Kira's safety depended on it.

* * *

_Click-clack._

_ Click-clack._

_ Click-clack._

A tower of matches was steadily growing in front of Near where he crouched on the ground.

"Near."

_Click-clack._ "Yes, Rester?"

"The kidnapped Director of the NPA has been killed."

A pause. "I see." _Click-clack. _"Interesting… If the hostage died, they wouldn't be able to make an exchange for the notebook. And if it was Kira – if it was truly Kira – I could narrow down my list of suspects." Near's voice lowered, until he murmured to himself, "The information of the Director's kidnapping wasn't released to the public, was it...? Hm..."

Near heard the shift of fabric that meant Rester had folded his arms. He tilted his head to the side a little, blinked once, and reached for a fresh handful of matches.

"They're going to announce that the Director's killer is hiding in LA," Rester reported, "but if the killer is American, this is going to be an international issue."

"That's even better," Near murmured, appearing unfazed. _Click-clack._ "We might be able to participate in the investigation much more easily then." This time, the wait wasn't a pause – it was a hesitation. "Have you been able to find out what Mello is doing?"

"No, I'm sorry," Rester replied, sounding disgruntled. "Why did you want to know?"

Near didn't answer. He just added another floor to his little tower, a model of the one they were all currently standing in.

_It would be just like you to make a move like this, Mello,_ he thought idly. _You always became too emotional and forgot to pay attention to what was important. _

The heavy clunk of boots on the stairs alerted him to his rival's presence. For as long as they'd been living there, he couldn't recall a single time when Mello had used the elevator; perhaps it was because he was too impatient?

Near rose to his feet and turned, careful not to knock the tower he'd spent most of the day constructing, which was quite a feat with his baggy clothes dragging along the floor. Cool grey eyes met sharp blue as Mello stopped at Near's floor. Mello's lip curled the slightest bit, as it always did in reaction to Near, but there was also a glimmer of something… smug in his expression. It was almost like he was saying '_I know something you don't_'.

Without saying a word, Mello continued up them.

Mello found Matt where he'd left him: sitting in the living room area, tapping away at one of his video games. Mello didn't understand the attraction of them, but if they made Matt happy he'd let him play them all he wanted.

At least, when he wasn't needed for his hacking skills.

Mello moved Matt's feet off of the sofa so he could sit beside him; the hacker quirked an eyebrow but didn't comment. He was used to this sort of behaviour from his partner. Mello pulled a phone out of his pocket and dialled, a smirk on his lips. Matt snorted quietly and continued tapping at the keys on his game.

_"Yagami here."_

Mello slung an arm around Matt's shoulders and kicked his feet up on the table, despite the fact that he was still wearing his boots - they _were_ clean, after all. There wasn't a smudge of mud in sight. "Your daughter's finally arrived here."

'Here' wasn't exactly where Mello was. It was a little further away.

_"There?"_

"I'm sure you've got a rough idea of where we are." Mello chuckled lightly. "The exchange will be made here. Bring the notebook by yourself to LA in two days."

_"I can't do the exchange unless I know my daughter is safe!"_ Soichiro barked. _"Let me hear her voice!"_

"I can't do that."

_"C-can't do that? You didn't-"_

"Relax, she's fine." Mello rolled his eyes, heaving a sigh. A grin spread across his lips then, baring a few teeth along with it. "But you and I both know that if I reveal to the public that we have her as our hostage, she'll probably die. But, then again, I'm not the police so I think we'll keep this between us."

_"I still want proof of my daughter's safety! That is a must for this exchange to take place!"_

"Fine, I'll email you a picture."

It didn't take long, but soon Mello had snapped his phone shut to let Soichiro stew over this fresh news. Grinning to himself, clearly pleased, Mello returned the mobile to his pocket before stretching leisurely, almost appearing like a cat.

Matt shook his head, a wry smile twisting his lips. "You're unbelievable," he muttered. It wasn't an accusation – it was an idle compliment, one said with faint humour and affection.

Mello elbowed him lightly. "It's what I aim for, Matty."

They sat in silence for a while, simply enjoying each other's company. Mello peered over Matt's shoulder, idly watching whatever he was doing. To him, the games Matt played seemed pointless; why should he waste hours of his time doing something that would give him no results, apart from maybe a brief moment of pride at having completed a pointless goal? Whatever the attraction was, Matt seemed to see it, and Mello was blind to it.

Mello was explosive. React first, think later. Matt was like the timer that held back the bomb that Mello was, made him pause and wait a little longer before blowing up and causing a catastrophe.

And Near?

If Near was anything, he was the fuse, at least in Mello's eyes. Every little thing that the younger boy did, every little advantage he gained over Mello (no matter how quickly it was relinquished) grated on his nerves. It sent the flame skittering down the fuse, closer to the bomb.

Mello's usually cool gaze flicked up to Matt's face. The ice in his eyes melted fractionally.

He needed Matt. Of course he did. He'd known that from the moment he'd set foot in Wammy's House, which was probably part of the reason he'd lashed out at him so much originally. But they'd come together, hadn't they? They'd gotten over their differences, and now they were the perfect pair.

Mello always said that it was their choice in the end, but Matt disagreed. It was Near's arrival that had caused them to team up. Naturally, Mello refused to even consider the possibility.

Matt could feel Mello's eyes on him. He'd been aware of it for a while now, but it was nothing new. His partner often slipped into his thoughts, unaware of his surroundings while he mulled something over. There were a few things that could snap him out of it, but Matt found he liked these quiet moments. It was rare to find a time when Mello was so at ease.

That was quite something, considering the current situation. He was aware that L had scolded Mello for his methods; when Mello had left L's room, he'd been furious. Several items had found themselves shattered, in pieces across the tiled floor, but they hadn't been anything that L couldn't easily replace, so it hadn't mattered.

When Mello's anger caught him, it took him a good long while to calm down again. Except, this time, after L's conversation, he'd been a different kind of angry, one Matt didn't know how to deal with. He'd been quiet, contained, almost methodical in the way he'd paced back and forth, head tipped forward so his hair could curtain his face. It was because L had been disappointed, that much was obvious.

He was used to shouting, crashing and ducking the occasional projectile accidentally thrown his way – he was practiced at working through those periods with Mello, and he knew that Mello was secretly pleased that he hadn't given up on him because of them. Mello just needed a rock, and Matt was it. Calm, cool, collected Matt.

Matt could always pinpoint the exact moment Mello 'woke up', and this was no exception.

He straightened a little in his seat, pushing himself up out of the slouch he'd sunken into. The haze cleared from his face, replaced by the sharp intensity Matt was used to. The entire feeling coming from Mello changed from _tired _or _lazy_, switching to _interested _and _eager._

"Finish whatever you're doing," he told the gamer, standing up and rolling his shoulders to loosen them. Matt allowed himself to admire Mello's form while he did so – not that Mello minded, really. "I need you to do something."

"What?" Matt raised his eyebrows. With a few quick presses of the buttons on his game, he saved his file, and he deftly shut the lid with a flick of his wrist.

Mello looked over his shoulder and grinned, a wide stretch of his mouth that bared his teeth. Matt's own lips curled to respond, albeit with a far lazier smile that was less intimidating.

"I need you to set up shop somewhere," he explained. Clearly displeased by the speed with which Matt was getting up, he reached down to tug on his forearm. "Come _on_, Matty; you're wasting time."

Heaving a sigh, Matt tucked his handheld into his pocket and followed Mello upstairs to their quarters. Ever the dramatic person, Mello flung open the door and immediately darted over to the wardrobe, rooting around inside, clothes landing on the floor behind him as he tossed them aside. Matt rolled his eyes, strolling across the room to perch on the bed. "You gonna tell me anything else, Mells?"

"I just need you to sort some stuff out for me!" Mello's voice was muffled from where his head was stuck in the wardrobe. There was a quiet 'ah ha!' of triumph, and he emerged with a suitcase in one hand. It was dropped onto the floor, too, kicked open, and clothes were chucked inside haphazardly. "You'll be meeting up with the others I hired, by the way, but I'll sort out a connection so they'll listen to you."

Mello sat back on his heels to catch Matt's eye, a softer smile on his face now. "If any of them don't believe you, or try to threaten you, you let me know, ok?"

Matt snorted. "I'm not useless, Mells."

"Do you handle a gun on a regular basis? No. You use keyboards."

"Point taken."

By the time evening rolled around, Mello had filled Matt's suitcase and shoved it into his arms. Neither of them had any doubt that L was watching, but he made no move to stop them; perhaps he thought Mello would be able to redeem himself by putting this new plan into action? Whatever was going through that mind of his, he didn't intercept Matt's departure.

He wouldn't be gone for long, a few weeks at the most. Hopefully, once Mello had achieved his goal of obtaining the notebook, he'd be able to put the Kira case to a close within that time.

Mello didn't go outside with him – it was too much of a risk. Wren and Lynx were busy elsewhere, thankfully. Mello doubted they'd be thrilled at witnessing the rather heated goodbye kiss between the two of them. They were well aware of their relationship and, naturally, Mello had told them right off the bat that whatever they said about it wouldn't make a difference. Wren had smiled wryly and flitted away like the bird she claimed the name of, while Lynx had nodded mutely.

That had been a good enough 'it's fine' for Mello. Matt had found the whole thing amusing but, then again, he _was_ Matt.

Mello didn't realise until he was gone just how much he needed Matt close by, but he didn't want to change his plan now.


End file.
